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Worst Cigar Names Ever
By Jesse | May 23, 2008 |
Some of the cigar brands out there are tongue twisters when it comes to pronouncing them, but if you want your cigar to fail these names will surely help you in that endeavor. The names alone will make you shudder as you pass them on the shelves.
Gorilla Fingers
Let’s associate an object we are going to place in our mouths with severed appendages of endangered animals.
Smokin’ Toad
I laughed when I saw this display at the RTDA Trade Show in 2007. Nothing says fine cigars like amphibians. You’ve licked the frog now smoke the toad. What really amazed me is I think more people actually smoke toads than this cigar. Seriously, let’s name a cigar for a way people get high.
ACID Nasty
Drew Estate often chooses some funky names for their cigars. I’ve never actually smoked this one, but something about the name kinda turns me off. Does it taste as Nasty as the name?
Iguana
The company behind this cigar is notorious for some of their house blends that they push heavily in their catalogs. I have problems smoking something named after an amphibian, or lizards. Puffing on an Iguana just brings up some disturbing images in my mind.
Fighting Cock
Don’t even get my started on the bad puns that have been tossed around about this one. In my book putting the word cock in the name of a phalic shaped object we put in our mouths is not the best of ideas. I don’t even want to know what some of the marketing slogans tossed around the company’s office were. Care to make up some of your own? Please, post them in the comments section.
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Tags: Bad Cigar Names, Fighting Cock Cigar, Gorilla Fingers, Iguana, Smokin Toad
Topics: Cigar Talk |
May 23rd, 2008 at 8:09 am
Great list!
May 23rd, 2008 at 9:28 am
Fighting Cock has got to be the worst. I can sort of see where they were trying to go with the name but, like you said, the word “cock” attached to a rather phallic object that guys are going to put in their mouth? No thanks. I don’t see how the marketing team missed that one.
May 23rd, 2008 at 10:36 am
If I ever come out with a cigar, I think I’ll name it “Dueling Codpieces”! LOL
Fighting Cock rules! …The world of poorly named cigars!
May 23rd, 2008 at 11:17 am
Isn’t the slogan unfortunately obvious?
“Suck on a Cock!!”
May 23rd, 2008 at 12:02 pm
This is awesome!
May 23rd, 2008 at 2:01 pm
It’s pretty bad when you will not buy or use a product based on its name. IF you ever look at the label of ingredients, I am sure you would not eat. Some of the names of the ingredients are enough to make you puke. As a cigar smoker myself. I sometimes purchase a cigar based on the brand name.
May 23rd, 2008 at 2:41 pm
Maybe not the worst but I always found the Big Butt Cigar kind of disturbing!
May 23rd, 2008 at 3:01 pm
Fighting Cock Cigars tagline proposal:
“Smoke a Cock tonight!”
May as well call it Veiny Brown Wiener or Big Poop Stick. And somebody got paid to name it?
May 23rd, 2008 at 4:59 pm
Wow, that must be a new spam comment technique: copying and pasting part of a comment already in the thread!
May 23rd, 2008 at 6:39 pm
Thanks for pointing that out Adam, I missed that it was spam.
May 23rd, 2008 at 7:22 pm
Smoking Cock Cigars: “C’mon and put a big hot cock in your mouth tonight!”
May 23rd, 2008 at 11:14 pm
After a hot plate of Schweddy Balls, enjoy a Fighting Cock.
Jerry,
I like Big Butts.
May 23rd, 2008 at 11:41 pm
Another name of a cigar that came up at tonight at the cigar shop: Devil’s Weed. Of course, that name still bows before the far inferior Fighting Cock.
May 25th, 2008 at 12:48 pm
The Acid Nasty cigars live up to their name. They’re pretty bad. I’m not sure what they were doing with those, but the best way to describe the flavor is kind of like when you’re at a baseball game and the wind is blowing really hard and a little dirt gets in your mouth.. Yes. That’s it exactly.
May 25th, 2008 at 1:46 pm
@Brian: I guess they didn’t realize that Devil’s Weed is slang for a different type of smokable leaf?
May 26th, 2008 at 7:30 am
@ all cock comments: Just don’t snip too much off with your cutter.
May 26th, 2008 at 10:36 am
@Daniel: Just nip the tip!
(Everyone who gets the reference is someone I want to share a cigar with.)
May 26th, 2008 at 12:04 pm
Just nip the tip. “Robin Hood: Men in Tights”?
May 26th, 2008 at 12:09 pm
Absolutely.
May 27th, 2008 at 8:53 pm
How bout this one-” It ain’t a smoke unless it’s a Cock” LOL
May 27th, 2008 at 9:00 pm
Unlike other Robin Hoods I can speak with an English Accent.
I loved that movie.
July 21st, 2008 at 10:37 am
Forget the name and try a Fighting Cock. Best cigar for a buck you will ever find. That is if you can find one.